Today we want to discuss how to comfortably incorporate pornography into your sex life. Many individuals worry that pornography sets unreasonable expectations in the bedroom, and this is a reasonable concern. In fairness, it’s important to point out that porn can elevate your sex life to new heights, in a positive way.
It’s possible that watching porn together can pique one’s interest and start a dialogue. With your significant other, it’s easy to fall into a habit that might be difficult to break out of. Couples might indulge their sexual fantasies by immersing themselves in erotica.
Sexual Medicine has published a study that suggests watching at least 40 minutes of porn twice a week can increase your desire for sex. Not to mention, seeing someone have sex is incredibly titillating, and experiencing this with your significant other may lead to a truly pleasurable experience.
Here are ways you can start to incorporate porn in the bedroom one step at a time:
How Can Porn Spice Things Up
When it comes to discussing sex with your partner, it’s not always easy. Personal sexual needs, dreams, and curiosity are often kept quiet by the people with whom you share your most private thoughts. This might lead to a dissatisfying sexual life.
However, talking about sex with your spouse can be intimidating, but it can also be liberating. As a result of discussing your sexual fantasies with others, you are establishing and maintaining a healthy, fulfilling, joyful sexual life.
Porn can be utilized to externalize your sexual wants and curiosities. The best thing is that your remark will spark a sexual dialogue. Your partner will definitely want to know more about what you say. In the same manner, your spouse will reveal their preferences and interests and encourage a more open dialogue between you both.
Have An Honest Conversation First
Your partner should not be subjected to any videos that you haven’t agreed on in advance, just like you wouldn’t touch them in a particular way or text them a nude photo if there wasn’t a discussion about boundaries beforehand. Some partners will take offense and feel pushed if you spring porn on them out of nowhere, while some people will be absolutely cool with it.
Approach It As A Team Effort
Some people find the concept of letting others into their bedroom, even if it’s simply through a camera, a bit demoralizing. It’s important to remember that the ultimate purpose of watching pornography with your partner is to increase sex between the two of you. You could try to mention something like this: “I had the idea that we could watch some videos to get some inspiration.”
Simply saying, “I thought we could watch something together” or “I’d want to show you something that really gets me going” will enough if insecurity is not a factor for your partner. You can also explore more information and learn about pornography on the whole via resources from BetterHelp if you’re having anxiety about broaching the subject.
Start with the Essentials
Try something that is familiar to you while also simulating a challenge you’d be willing to take on if you don’t know where to begin. Novel kink scenarios and techniques are best saved for your next porn session.
Interactivity Is Key
Engage with your partner while watching porn to make it apparent that this is not a replacement for your sex life. Take a closer look and tell them how amazing they’d look doing what is on your mind.
Be Honest About Whether You Like What You’re Watching
Be honest about your reactions to each video and agree not to criticize each other based on what turns you on or off. In the bedroom, it might be awkward to discuss sexual fantasies or fetishes with your partner, so watching porn provides a safe place to do so.
Remember: Porn Isn’t Your Sex Ed Class
Porn isn’t a realistic representation of sex just because it can motivate you to have sex in the real world. Expecting your partner to act or appear like a pornstar is ludicrous. Keep an open mind, and when things get out of hand, you may even have a good chuckle about it. Laughter, after all, is said to be an aphrodisiac.
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